Do you know Every year, millions of people make New Year’s resolutions, but research suggests shockingly 92% of people fail at their goals. These people say something like“I just need more motivation.” Or, “I wish I had as much willpower as you do.” This is the wrong approach. Research shows that willpower or self-discipline is like a muscle. it can be developed and nurtured.
Making a New Year’s resolution is a great way to make a positive change in your life, whether it’s exercising, waking up earlier, or saving for retirement Meditating regularly. University of Scranton research suggests that only 8% of people achieve their New Year’s goals.Why do so many people fail at goal-setting, and what are the secrets behind those who succeed?
The explosion of studies into how the brain works have more experts attempting to explain the science behind this 8 % of success.The vital reason behind 92% of people’s failure is that their dependency on motivation alone.Because Motivation is fleeting, Unreliable, inconsistent, And importantly it is based on emotion. And we know how fickle and unpredictable emotions can get.
Your reasons for exercising, Saving, or meditating may stay constant. But your desire or willingness to carry out the tasks you’ve set will waver one way or another. Let’s check out scenarios where a motivation-based approach to self-improvement can boomerang.
Jerry got up early in the morning, just feeling pumped to hit the gym. This isn’t his first attempt to develop an exercise routine. But he’s feeling super motivated today, and perhaps this rush of enthusiasm can make the difference,
Day 1 went well. His goal was to run for 30 minutes. But he went the extra mile
Days 2 to 11 were also identical to the first day. Jerry was overflowing with motivation, and he surpassed his goals every time. He’s already feeling stronger and fitter!
But the 12th day came with an unpleasant surprise.
He received an email from his boss rejecting his leave request, and this means a beach getaway with his clique is out of the question. Just when he was getting ready to show his fit body, Jerry realizes he would be spending hours in his workstation while his buddies are partying by the shore.
Upset and disappointed, Jerry skipped the gym.
Day 13 came, and Jerry was feeling guilty about missing the previous day’s workout. He knows he needs to go to the gym. He knows the perks of staying fit. But his emotional state is in shambles, and he can’t talk himself into getting motivated.
The cycle of missing the gym and feeling so bad about it that he misses yet another session continues. And Jerry isn’t getting closer to achieving his fitness goals.
The enthusiasm and strong desire to exercise, which jerry came to relish, ran out all of a sudden. Without the feel-good emotions, exercising early in the morning doesn’t sound appetizing.
You’ve probably experienced the same dip in levels of motivation just when you’re generating momentum. Why does this bizarre turn happen? Shouldn’t accomplishing a day’s task make us feel better and compelled to do more?
The answer takes us back full circle to emotions and their nature. Excitement, desire, willingness – these positive emotions one feels in anticipation of a task are fleeting, lasting for only 1 to 6 weeks. Stanford professor BJ Fogg calls this as “Motivation waves.(stress)” “Motivation has limited shelf life” and it’s inconsistent.
So Is Motivation Bad? Far from it! How can feeling good and making impressive progress on a goal be bad!? However, motivation is a sprinter. It can help us finish short-term projects fast and strong.
But when undertaking long-term endeavors or developing good habits, strong and positive emotions can only get you started. To get through the long haul, you need discipline. Yes, Self-discipline is number one ingredient for success. It is pretty important to our achievement, or even more important than IQ – as the Research from the University of Pennsylvania indicates high-discipline have much better grades than high-IQ students. Michael Jordan practiced and trained every single day to be the Michael Jordan. Sachin Tendulkar practiced and trained every single day to be the Sachin Tendulkar. Chess grand master Wesley So became the world no. 2 without a coach, but only after focusing on his training and turning away from the internet.
You can bet that these highly successful people have had their fair share of bad days. On some days, getting out of bed to train must’ve felt like scaling Mount Everest. And you can be sure they’ve thought of ditching practice for more fun and less demanding pursuits. But they didn’t, most of the time. Yes, these fine folks sure have fallen prey to temptations and distractions more than once. However, they didn’t let guilt and negative emotions paralyze them and their progress.
But here’s the catch: Strengthening your resolve and self-discipline is anything but easy.I understand there is no glamour in the word self-discipline like motivation has. Self-Discipline seems Unappealing and boring. Head over to Amazon’s book section, and you will find the Motivation Self-Help section stocked with over 89000 books. As for self-discipline, the topic doesn’t even have its own section, and a search yielded only 8700+ books. You can see the same trend in Reddit. The GetDisciplined subreddit only has 200000 members, while the GetMotivated subreddit boasts more than 10 million subscribers! And when you go to YouTube, finding videos of rousing speeches is easier than finding videos on how to develop self-control.
What’s up with the lopsided preference for feeding motivation rather than getting disciplined? The answer: Because developing self-discipline is uncomfortable.When you’re motivated, getting started on a project or task is easy. You’re excited. You’re pumped up. And the decisive action is the logical follow-up. When strengthening self-discipline, however, you’re not enthusiastic about a task. Maybe you feel neutral. But most of the time, you’d rather do something else like watch TV, chat on Facebook, or play video games – anything that’s more fun than the task at hand. And you have to do what you’ve set out to do anyway. In simpler words, it feels uncomfortable.
But Keep in Mind “It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day. That’s the hard part. But it does get easier.” the pains of self-discipline persist for quite a while. But they will disappear. But HOW and when? once this repeated action converted into “habit” there won’t be any feeling of uncomfortability nor need of any motivation. You Will not Have to Endure Crappy Emotions for a Long Time. After forming positive habit there will not be any craving of smoking nor there will be pain of getting out of bed in early morning
Turning a goal into a habit means really focusing on it, intensely, for certain days, to the exclusion of all else. The more you can focus on it, the more it’ll be on autopilot.But once you put it on autopilot, once a habit is firmly established, you don’t have to focus on it. action become so automatic and effortless, it complete without even thinking of it.
Lets Summarize this
Motivation may be an initial fuel to boost towards our long-term goal, but it’s finite. when it gets over we have to rely on Self-discipline until the establishment of habit. That’s it ! then action becomes automatic!
so if we want to create concrete lifetime positive behaviour, which does not demand motivation, the pain of self-discipline, we have to establish a habit
so Let’s learn more about the power of habit, how to form Habit and self-discipline in next lessons.